Robosexual Marriage

A Story

It was 1967, the civil rights movement was in full swing and Nichelle had just finished her first season as Lieutenant Uhura on Star Trek.  She was preparing to leave the show in order to pursue an opportunity that had opened up on Broadway.

She walked into the producer's office, show creator Gene Roddenberry, thanked him, and handed in her resignation.  He was less than amused, and convinced her to take a week to think it over.  She agreed, and headed off the next day for a fundraiser in Beverly Hills.

Early in the evening during the fundraiser someone approached her and asked if she would like to meet "Her greatest fan."  She gracefully accepted and walked across the room to meet the mystery Trekker.

"There he was, my leader." she often says when telling this story.  My leader was the term she used to describe this man she held in such high esteem, but had never met.  This man, who claimed to be her biggest fan, was Martin Luther King Jr.

"You have one of the most important roles, this is the first" he told her, "It's brilliant, it's intelligence, and you do it with beauty and grace…"  he went on and on about his high regard for what she was doing.

She then informed him of her decision to leave the show, and was shocked at the response.

"You cannot leave.  Do you understand.  It has been heavenly ordained, this is God's gift and onus for you.  You have changed the face of television forever.  This is not a black role, this is not a female role... This is a unique role, in a unique point in time, that breathes life into what we are marching for. Equality."

As he continued, Nichelle was speechless and full of emotion.

"You have no idea the power of television.  This man has created a reality.  And because it's in the 23rd century and you are the Chief Communications Officer, and fourth in command, of a Starship going on a five year mission going where no man or woman has gone before, it means that this is just the beginning of where we are going."

...

Nichelle Nichols 1967

The Outcast

Someone you would classify as a nerd, a geek, a trekkie or a dork that grew up during my generation knows what it is to be an outcast.  We didn't have pop culture sitcoms celebrating the life of the geek, technology built by geeks in the hands and pockets of every person, or software developed by geeks governing the social lives of the masses.  We were the kids that smelled funny, or the kids that didn't know how to dress, or the kids couldn't figure out how to get their hair cut right.  For some of us, every phrase we uttered in front of other kids was somehow the perfect tool to be turned back on us and used for ridicule.  It wasn't about how we acted; it was about who we were.  The things that interested us and the way our minds worked weren't any better or worse than anyone else’s, but they were different.  Being different is enough to be on the receiving end of some very real mistreatment.

For me, it came to a head in Junior High.  After school one day, thirty or so students watched as four guys stuffed me in a half full trash can and rolled me across the gym.  They then pulled me out of said trash can, drug me across to the bathroom and propped the door open so everyone could watch while I was shoved in a urinal they had all just peed in and flushed.  The students were laughing and cheering while I was drug back out into the gym and held in place while one of them punched me in the face.  It would have continued, but a few members of the girls’ basketball team intervened on my behalf.

I ended up being one of the lucky ones.  I shot up in 8th grade, had a few of the proverbial "stand up to the bully" moments, and ended up embracing my geekdom and using it as my social currency.  Although I'm not bitter about my experiences, two aspects of that period of my life resonate strongly with me to this day.  The first is that feeling of powerless, and the second is being called "fag".

"Fag" or "Queer" was the insult of choice, and most of the humor centered on jokes about how much I truly enjoyed penis.  How my social ineptitude and sexual orientation had any relation, I never quite understood.  But when I started getting to an age where some of my friends, and later family, discovered they were homosexual, the fact that being called "gay" was the worst insult anyone could think of really got to me.  People point this out often on the topic of how society treats the LGBTQ community, so it is easy to let the observation pass without sufficiently understanding its significance. Try to understand this.  To be homosexual in America is to be something many people believe is so disgusting, that it is the worst insult they can muster.  As powerless and tormented as I felt all those years, once I realized this it made my difficulties as an outcast seem insignificant.

Back to the Story...

Nichelle Nichols returned to Gene Roddenberry and told him what Dr. King had said.  He looked down, and then up again with tears in his eyes.

"God bless Dr. King, finally someone realizes what I am trying to do here."

Nichelle retracted her offer of resignation, and embraced her role and the responsibility that came with it.

...

The Computer Scientist

Aside from growing up indoctrinated by Science Fiction, I also grew up a computer nerd that turned into a computer engineer as an adult.  It is a passion that I and many of my community have for taking math and computer science and using them to create amazing things.

I owe my career and my passion chiefly to one man, the man who first conceived of the computer as it is today; a brilliant mathematician by the name of Alan Turing.

Turing was laying on the lawn one afternoon at Cambridge and imagined a machine.  The machine had three components: an infinitely long tape, a device to move the type, and a head that can read and write to the tape.  All that this tape would contain was 1' and 0's, and with those 1's and 0's this machine could do anything.  It was 1935, he was 22 years old, and he had just planted the seed of the information age.

During World War II he was recruited along with other young mathematicians for a top secret project by Winston Churchill.  The Germans had this device called the Enigma, and with it they were able to encrypt every transmission and coordinate all their military efforts in secret.  The code was said by many to be unbreakable, but Turing saw its Achilles heel.  If the code was made by a machine, it could be broken by a machine.  He single handedly built a machine called The Bombe, and that machine broke the code.  The contribution of this to the Allied war effort was so significant that some historians say it likely shortened the war by two full years.  Alan Turing was a war hero, a geek that used his geek powers to save millions, and he never received a medal.

Several years after the war he made a mistake.  He admitted to a police officer he was homosexual, and in Britain in the 40s and 50s it was illegal to engage in homosexual acts.  He was arrested, tried, convicted and sentenced.  Some crackpot got the idea that by giving men high doses of Estrogen on a daily basis it would somehow cure homosexuality.  In reality, it is a gruesome and embarrassing form of chemical castration.  He became a laughing stock in his field, started to grow breasts and lost his ability to function sexually.

In spite of all of this, his greatest source of depression was the fact that he no longer had the respect of his field.  He was just beginning to push the boundaries of conceptualizing artificial intelligence, but with this he felt his work was falling on deaf ears.  "Turing believes machines think, Turing lies with men, Therefore machines do not think," he once wrote in a letter to a friend.

So one day he took an apple and injected it with a large amount of cyanide.  Snow White was his favorite movie, and he always liked the part about the apple.  His cleaner found him dead the next day.  In the end, he ended up cremated because no Christian Cemetery would take the body of a suicide.

The Bombe

The Rest of the Story...

Years later Nichelle was signing autographs at a Star Trek convention in the U.K. when a young man approached her table.  It was the 80s, and a group of very militant white supremacists called Skinheads were terrorizing London.  This man approaching was dressed in a way that gave every indication he was a part of this group.

"I'm not here to cause any trouble," he told her, "I just came here to tell you that because of you on Star Trek, I stopped being what I was on my way to be.  I came here dressed as I used to be so you would know."

The young man started to cry, and Nichelle started as well.  He continued, "I can never be that.  I understand what the future is, and Star Trek depicts it."

As Nichelle hugged and comforted the man, she came to the realization that he was right.  Dr. Martin Luther King was right about Gene Roddenberry's dream, and the fact that because it was on television it became more than a possibility.  The vision he had of the future became reality.

The Mind of a Geek

Being who we are, we know what it is to be outcast, and are free enough to think deeply about the nature of it.  Issac Asimov, Arthur C. Clarke, William Gibson and the like pushed us to think thoroughly about the nature of what it is to be human.  Science has shown us how similar we all are.  And history has taught us that separate but equal is not equality.  And above all else, we see the future very clearly in our minds.  We know where humanity is going, and aren't easily fooled by the obfuscation of contemporary politics.

We were there at the Tribunal with Soren when she compelled her people to understand that her love was just as pure as the ways that others loved.  We know too well the faces of the spectators, the blank look in their eyes when fear and bigotry prevented any logical argument or compassionate plea even enter the realm of consideration.

"It is not unnatural.  I am not sick because I feel this way.  I do not need to be helped.  I do not need to be cured.  What I need, and what all of those like me need, is your understanding and your compassion.  We have not injured you in any way, and yet we are scorned and attacked.  And all because we are different.  What we do is no different from what you do.  We talk, and laugh, we complain about work, and we wonder about growing old.  We talk about our families and we worry about the future.  And we cry with each other when things seem hopeless.  All of the loving things we do with each other, that is what we do.  And for that we are called misfits, and deviants, and criminals.  What right do you have to punish us.  What right do you have to change us?  What makes you think you can dictate how people love each other?"

Whether it be a member of the J'naii race in Star Trek wanting to be allowed to be of a certain sex, a black man in the 60s trying to convince a white dominated State that separate is not equal or a same-sex couple wanting to have the same marital relationship and recognition and rights as a heterosexual couple, or a genius and a hero who is driven to suicide because of his sexuality... it is all the same.  There is no difference.  Close minded people fear and hate what is different, and religion is not an excuse.  Men look to religious texts to justify things that are immoral, and it isn't hard to twist excerpts from any religion to any end.  Geeks, nerds and Trekkies know this because we were raised by a subculture that trained us to look back at ourselves with an honest eye.  It is an integral part of who we are.

If you dig into another Sci-Fi series, Stargate SG-1, and skip to episode 200 there is one part that perfectly captures the essence of what science fiction represents, and who we are as those raised with it.  The episode itself was very tongue-in-cheek, sort of a montage of fun skits strung together with a very loose premise.  At the very end, right before the credits, one of the characters is giving a mock interview and says the following.

Science Fiction is an existential metaphor that allows us to tell stories about the human condition.  Issac Asimov once said, "Individual science fiction stories may seem as trivial as ever to the blinder critics and philosophers of today — but the core of science fiction, its essence, the concept around which it revolves, has become crucial to our salvation if we are to be saved at all."

This is our faith on hate...

Why Christians Should Support Same-Sex Marriage:

1) The Greatest Threat to the Sanctity of Marriage is Heterosexual Christians

No matter what way you look at it, the greatest threat to marriage is heterosexual Christians getting divorced. That's right, Christians make up the majority of divorces! Jesus was very clear, the ONLY reason divorce is acceptable is in instances of infidelity. Yet, divorce without cause is legal in most States, and there is no push to ban straight divorce! So, if "preserving the sanctity of marriage" is so important, where is Prop 8.1 banning straight divorce?

The truth is, most Christians are perfectly ok with telling other people what to do, but are unwilling to give up their own rights. In short, they are hypocrites.

Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye. - Matthew 7:5

2) Christians Pick and Choose Their Rules

Yes, Leviticus mentions homosexuality, and Corinthians mentions "homosexual offenders". It is amazing that with just those two passages, modern Christians can infer God's position and fervor on an issue. Let's look at some other things the Bible talks about:

Things Mentioned in the Bible that Christians Ignore
see larger list here: http://biblebabble.curbjaw.com/laws.htm, this is an exert

Don't let cattle graze with other kinds of Cattle (Leviticus 19:19)
Don't have a variety of crops on the same field. (Leviticus 19:19)
Don't wear clothes made of more than one fabric (Leviticus 19:19)
Don't cut your hair nor shave. (Leviticus 19:27)
If a man cheats on his wife, or vise versa, both the man and the woman must die. (Leviticus 20:10). I wonder if Dr. Laura would like that one to be enforced?
If a man has sex with a woman on her period, they are both to be "cut off from their people" (Leviticus 20:18)
People who have flat noses, or is blind or lame, cannot go to an altar of God (Leviticus 21:17-18)
Anyone who curses or blasphemes God, should be stoned to death by the community. (Leviticus 24:14-16)
Don't let cattle graze with other kinds of Cattle (Leviticus 19:19)
Anyone who dreams or prophesizes anything that is against God, or anyone who tries to turn you from God, is to be put to death. (Deuteronomy 13:5)
If anyone, even your own family suggests worshipping another God, kill them. (Deuteronomy 13:6-10)
If you find out a city worships a different god, destroy the city and kill all of it's inhabitants... even the animals. (Deuteronomy 13:12-15)
Kill anyone with a different religion. (Deuteronomy 17:2-7)

Now, realistically no one is expected to follow these rules. They come from a different time, are out of context etc. etc. Christians use logic and discernment to dismiss them. Wow, so you are allowed to do that?

3) The New Testament Never Condemns Homosexuality

I have often heard that "Sexual Immorality" and "Uncleanliness" |Greek word pornea and akatharsia| include homosexuality. This is an out of hand explination for why, even though homosexuality is such a big sin, it is never mentioned by Jesus. Biblical scholars will often cite their understanding of history to back this up. This is a complete falsehood.

At the time of Christ, the Greek concept of what was considered "sexually immoral" was considerably liberal by even today's standards. Homosexuality and sex outside of marriage was widespread and, with the exception of certain ethnic minorities, not considered immoral. Each author of the New Testament chose to use non-Hebrew Greek to write their Gospels and Epistles. Luke himself was a gentile, and his works are specifically geared towards gentiles. There are many examples of various authors using Hebrew words where Greek words did not convey a concept properly, so the argument that the writers were speaking in "Greek terms" but communicating in "Hebrew terms" is borderline ludicrous.

These "biblical scholars" are nothing of the sort. They do not objectively study history and present the facts as they find them. Many, if not most, of them already have a picture of biblical history in their heads, and search for anecdotal evidence that support only their world view. They are a disgrace to history, and a disgrace to the truth.

Outside of mention of "sexual immorality" some point to as evidence of reference to homosexuality, there are also mentions of Sodom and Gomorrah. The assertion that Sodom and Gomorrah's sin was allowing homosexuality is an assumption, not anything explicitly stated in the bible. The specific mention of homosexuality in Corinthians does not say it is a sin, it uses the term "homosexual offenders", which may be people who engage in homosexual acts for personal pleasure (not monogamous love), the bible doesn't give us enough to draw a specific conclusion. As for Timothy's one mention of "homosexuals" you see in some Bibles, this is also often translated as "perverts" and the Greek used does not specifically mean homosexual. Any assertion that the BIBLE says monogamous, homosexual love is a sin is based on insufficient evidence. It is nothing more than a personal choice to interpret these passages in favor of hate, bigotry and judgmentalism as oppose to love, understanding and humility.

4) It Isn't Your Place

That's right:

And Jesus answering said unto them, Render to Caesar the things that are Caesar's, and to God the things that are God's. And they marvelled at him. - Mark 12:17

and don't forget

There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor? - James 4:12

The government and the law is not the place to impose morality. That is the job of society, religion and family. When you put morality in the hands of the government, you devalue it for those who practice it willingly.

Furthermore, the laws the protect YOUR rights to marry heterosexually should also protect THEIR rights to marry homosexually. Every time you try to use the law to impress your religious values onto someone else, you open up the door for it to happen to you in the future. Most Christians worry about the threat of Sharia Law expanding in Europe and the United States, yet they are trying to push their own religious law here in the United States.

And once again, hypocrisy. Christians are all for using the law to prevent Same-Sex Marriage, but not to enforce other rules God has given out for us:

Christian Morals Christians Aren't So Quick to Make Law
The rich are required to give to the poor.
|mentioned about 16 times in the bible.|
GOD WANTS US TO RAISE TAXES ON THE JOB CREATORS!!!!!

People should make peace, not war.
|A "Be" Attitude, mentioned in Romans and many other places.|
GOD WANTS US TO OUTLAW WAR!!!!!

Turn the other cheek. Love your enemy.
|One of the most profound and unique aspects of Jesus's teachings.|
GOD WANTS US TO OUTLAW FIGHTING BACK!!!! QUICK, TELL ISRAEL!!!!

Jesus instructed his Apostles not to collect money. Paul instructed people to only give what they want.
|Tithes was a part of Hebrew society, and only covered food. Jesus didn't take offerings, or build churches.|
GOD WANTS US TO OUTLAW CHURCHES TAKING TITHES!!!!

Wow, this sounds crazy? You don't really expect people to take these passages literally and make laws based on them, do you?

Exactly.

5) Change is Coming

2,000 years ago a man showed up and tried to destroy the Church, and almost succeeded.
500 years ago another man tried the same and almost succeeded.

Today another change is coming. Like Jesus Christ in 34 A.D. and Martin Luther in 1518 A.D., the 21st Century is brewing a new generation of Christians. We were raised and believe, but we do not buy the doctrine of man. So much of what is taught in Churches today has little to do with the Bible, but are leftovers from past political movements, past prejudices and past attempts at accumulating power. When put up against scrutiny, they all fall apart.

I have been close to many people in my life who have also happened to be homosexual. One of them is a close family member. This family member is the kindest and most virtuous person I have ever known. I care about this person greatly, and I know their morality and rightness with God is secured. Even though I have tried in the past to guide, and even chide, this person; the truth is I look up to them. They are already the person I hope one day to become.

What the Bible taught against was sexual promiscuity, sex that was for nothing more than fun, or sex that hurt others. Two homosexual people in a loving relationship that get married is right and just. 1 in every 1000 people are born with both sexual organs, and doctors make the choice what gender they will be. Gender is physiology and hormones. It dictates much about our bodies and our emotions, about how we start out, but in the modern world has little to do with who we end up becoming.

Pray away the gay doesn't work. It results in depression, a lack of fufillment and sometimes even suicide. There has never been, never been, NEVER been a successful biblical "cure" for homosexuality. If you believe God is all powerful, and can cure all, this should be a sure fire sign that homosexuality is NOT A DISEASE.

What I cannot tolerate is injustice, especially against someone who I love and who deserves to be happy. For those of you who decide to stay the course and draw a line in the sand, know that one day this person I care about will want to get married. And there is no way that I will let anyone, or anything stand in the way of their happiness. And if you choose to stand in my way, all I will say to you is this: "Get thee behind me, Satan: thou art an offence unto me: for thou savourest not the things that be of God, but those that be of men."

He started out painting horses in motion. It was the motion that drew him to the races, and eventually to the ballet and the dancers. But the more he painted the dancers, the more he wanted to paint women in their true motion. Their natural, and raw, locos. And there is nothing more basil to the nature of being a higher life form than the act of bathing oneself. So that's where he went.

At first it was the tranquil poses, then the transitional poses, and then it evolved into the capture of the most awkward and unappealing positions of bathing. When a woman has to hunker over and contort her form to scrub the bottom of a foot, or an armpit, or a thigh. He wanted to find a motion, and activity, that was very basic, and by that virtue very authentic. His contemporaries felt he was ruining the image the the female form, but I think he perfected it.

Degas's Female Form

I first saw Degas's work when I was 13 at an exhibit in the Minnesota Museum of American Art.  That exhibit defined how I saw the female body in my minds eye for the next 13 years.  That is, until I saw this:

I'm not one for pop music, and I would say if I discover 3 new artists I like a year it has been an exceptional year for music with me.  But this one song, and the video, resonated with my mind's eye perception of women in motion more strongly than even Degas.  The framing of each shot, the contrast of colors, the contrast of perfection and imperfection, the combination of pristine ballet and free form dancing, the facial expressions, the flexing and relaxing of muscles and most importantly the music came together to complete the picture Degas had began to paint, for me, over a decade prior.

West's Female Form

I now had this music video from an industry I didn't respect, from a genre of music I had long given up on, and from an artist I thought of as nothing more than a douche bag... changing the way I looked at art and beauty.

As of yet, I haven't found another Kanye West song or video that had an impact on me worth writing about.  Maybe it was the pinnacle of his art, or maybe it was a fluke crossing of his stream into mine, but whatever it was I am glad I found it.

So, this one goes out to the douche bag.  This one goes out to the assholes.  This one goes out to the scumbags, every one of them that I know.

Runaway from me baby, runaway.  Runaway from me baby, runaway.  Baby I got a plan, runaway as fast as you can.

He's bald, and short, and always wears a black sport coat.

He stands behind me, precisely six feet to my seven o'clock, just out of sight.  And he refuses to go away.

I've tried ignoring him, of course.
  I'll tell myself he isn't there, but it has no affect.  No matter how much I distract myself, I can always feel his gaze tickling the back of my neck.

Reasoning won't help either.  I've tried negotiation to no avail.  He just won't budge.  It's as if my attempts to be rid of him are almost comical is his eyes.

I can't tell anyone about him.   As soon as I point him out, they will immediately notice he is there and then they will have the same problem I do.

And, I can't even give him back.  If I confront the Gods, and tell them what I have done, their very ability to recitify the situation will vanish, as if it never was. 

There is something very disconcerting about a little bald man in black following you around until the end of time.  What scares me is not his presence, but the idea that I could come to accept it.  And then be comforted by it.  And then, even come to embrace it.

Being the only person that knows the little bald man in black is lonely.  I wish someone would talk to me.  I wish he would talk to me.

But he wouldn't, now would he.  That's kind of the point.

1) How many drinks you can have in an hour before you are unfit to drive.

2) What type of wine you like.

3) If you prefer kitch or risk.

The Lay of the Land

The Napa Valley wine region is a north/south valley surrounded by relatively small mountains.  The two main thorough-fairs are Highway 29 //the tourist trap// and the Silverado Trail //the less but still very beaten path//.   On your first trip to Napa, you should probably hover between the cities of Calistoga, St. Helena and Yountville.  The wineries and vineyards themselves are off mostly out of city limits, with some tasting rooms and all the restaurants in town. Fun Fact: It is illegal to have a picnic outside of city limits in Napa County.

Click here to view a map.

What to do

10 am to 12 pm

Visit 2-3 wineries on the Silverado Trail.  When you show up, expect to pay 30 for a "flight" of wine to taste.  This is usually a series of 4-6 wines from light whites to full bodied reds, 1-2 ounces in each glass.  The point of this is for them to try to sell you on a bottle, so ask questions here and make them sell you the wine.

Silverado Trail Wineries

12pm to 2pm

Return to the nearest town //Yountville, St. Helena or Calistoga// for lunch.  Just prior to eating, make a quick stop at an in town tasting room.  Ask for a recommendation from the tasting room staff for lunch in your price range.  If they mention somewhere they have worked or know someone, ask if you can for name and remember it.

In Town Tasting Rooms

2pm to 4pm

Work you way back toward the town with your hotel, hitting up another 2-3 wineries along the way.  If you are of a lower bmi, this might be the point when you want to start drinking less and spitting more.  This is probably also the point when your designated driver should stop wine tasting.

4pm to 6pm

Since most of the wineries close early, park your car at your hotel in town and venture out on foot.  As with lunch, hit up a few tasting rooms and ask for recommendations for dinner.

6pm to 8pm

Feel free to try another tasting flight with dinner.  This time, ask for wine from Argentina, Spain, Australia etc. etc. - the restaurants will usually have an international wine selection.

Restaurant Tasting in Town

8pm to Bed

Head over to the in town market //or Dean and Deluca's// to pick up some cheap wine, bread, cheese, olives, chocolate etc.  Head back to the hotel and spend the rest of the evening discussing the day, sharing photos, etc. etc.  Note: Many places close before 8pm, so you may have to do the shopping earlier in the day.

Wine & Cheese for the Room

As Scheduled:

Try wine tours.  There are the kitchy ones: Bottle Shock Tour, Sterling Tram, etc., and the difficult.  The difficult being calling a winery and asking for a private tour or barrel sampling.  You will usually have to hint that you may buy a case or two.

Try a spa session.  If your hotel/B&B doesn't have a spa, sneak into one that does and abuse it until you get kicked out.

Try some local entertainment or music.  I like to get friendly with the musicians by buying them drinks, then hang out with them after their gig is done.

Ten Napa Newcomer Tips

1.  Download the local tourism association apps for your smart phone like this one.  The deals are so good most tasting rooms will try to wiggle out of them, so make sure you hold them to it.

2.  Most tasting rooms will wave tasting fees if you buy at least one bottle.  Even if it isn't stated, if you twist their arm they will usually cave.

3.  Guys and Gals, like I say with anything in life, a little flirting and flattery goes a long way.  Butter up the staff and you can get free cheese, chocolates, extra pours and even club discounts on wine.

4.  Don't be afraid to say you don't like something and why.  You may get an extra few pours if you do.

5.  Ask staff to recommend other wineries/restaurants/tasting rooms by name.  Get specific staff member names for your next destination, and see if you can squeeze out an anecdote.  Then, when you get there,name drop and claim you were promised a free tasting.

6.  Ask for free swag.  Most wineries have old labels, branded bottle openers etc. that make great gifts or nick nacks.

7.  Don't be afraid to take the wine and cheese to the hotel pool/hot tub at night.  You can probably get away with it for an hour or two if no one notices, and its great fun.

8.  Ask questions about the wine! Each bottle usually has a laundry list of details given by the staff including the soil, the weather, the fermenting, the barreling, what cologne the winemakers wear, what type of shampoo they use, etc. etc.  Ask for specifics about why they did this, what it adds to the wine and how it affects the finished product.

9.  Remember that wine is unpretentious, and about fun.  You will run into arrogance, prickishness and bombasticity galore.  Here is the thing, the people who really know wine //as in those who drink it for the tasting and make it for the passion// usually play down the formality of the industry.  Make jokes, have fun, be merry.  Flaunt your ignorance, and people will like you more for it.

10.  Don't waste your time on staff that is unfriendly, uninteresting or unwilling to barter.  There are plenty that will be willing, just walk right out the door and find somewhere else.  Trust me, its worth it.

Seven Tasting Rooms to Visit

1. Cornerstone

This tasting room is off the main road in the heart of Yountville.  They had great wine prices, better tasting prices, comfortable couches, an amazing atmosphere and the most brule Syrah I've ever tasted.  Hands down the best tasting experience in Napa, and little known to boot.

Best Tasting Experience

2. Envy

This single vineyard winery is just North of Calistoga.  They only sell out of their tasting room, and have a very limited production.  It is elegant, quaint and has wine you will find no where else.  Plus, the hostess Barbie is as passionate and sexy as the wine she is selling.  Note: Yes, her name really is Barbie.

Best Merlot, Sexiest Hostess

3. Stag's Leap

Stag's Leap S.L.V. is the famous Cabernet that beat out the French reds in the 1976 judgement of Paris.  Their Artemis is the best Cab from Napa under 80-20 dollar rolls from Bouchon in order to sober them up faster, and running over to keep their part of the table clean when they are about to drop/spill something.

Every day I spend an hour eating in a small box, an hour playing with my kids in a small-medium box, an hour talking to my wife about my day in small boxes, two hours cleaning or organizing or getting ready for my days in small boxes, three hours driving in a very small box, six hours sleeping in a slightly bigger box, and finally ten hours sitting and working at a desk in another small box.  My life, love, connection, exploration, pleasure, challenge, triumph and defeat exist purely in a state of isolation from the diversity and wonder of the world at large.

There is a lake high in the Sierras that sits atop a mountain.  At its south shore a sheer cliff opens up to a wide open valley.  In the middle of the Arizona desert twenty miles of I-10 there is a Mesa it only takes four hours to climb.  From its edge you can see the sun setting deep in Mexico.  At the top of a jungle brush covered mountain in the middle of Oahu there is a spot you can stand and see wilderness and ocean at the same time.  You can also always feel half of your body being rained on by the misty Windward weather while the other half is dried by the sunny Leeward climate.  A few blocks off Alvarado Street in Monterrey there is a coffee shop surrounded by a cobblestone courtyard.  Every night it is filled with intellectuals, and drifters, and bums, and soldiers and students... all in lively debate and exchange.  Or the little alley painted green behind the City Lights bookstore in San Francisco.  Last time I was there I met three kids busking their way to Louisiana.  We sang the blues and fell asleep under the words "VESUVIO".

Upper Highland Lake

No matter how many memories I have of life outside the tiny boxes, in the end those boxes get the lion's share of my time.  Think about how rediculous this is for a moment.

There are a hundred billion galaxies in the observable universe, of them only a fraction old enough to have had a chance to possibly develop intelligent life.  Those galaxies each have over a hundred billion stars, but again only a fraction have infrequent enough super novas in their local region to give life a chance to exist.  And of those, only a fraction have a planetary system that contains enough planets to provide protection from debris to give life a chance.  And of those, only a fraction likely posses the mass, orbit, temperature and composition to provide the conditions for stable and sustainable life to form.  And create beings.

Expansion of the Universe

Those beings start out with no identity, simple cellar organisms carelessly swapping DNA, none containing a distinct identity.  Then the sharing stops, and for three billion years the ones left compete to survive, steadily growing more complex and more intelligent from generation to generation.  Fractal growth and emergent characteristics allow for these simple beings to become complex life forms, and exist together in perfect balance in a self-sustaining and thriving ecosystem.  Everything from the origin of matter, to the behavior of heavenly bodies across the cosmos, to the pressures and precipitations that form weather patterns, to the hundreds of elements that work together to form stable geology, to the confluence of the bio and the eco all working together to keep life moving forward.  Thirteen billion years, and a simple sub-atomic system with very simple rules has emerged and expanded into a machine that not only creates life, but only works in the direction of advancing existence.

Abiogenesis

This life creates Native American, Aboriginal and Tibetan sandpainting.  It creates Vagner's Ring Cycle, Shakespeare's Hamlet.  It builds Mayan temples, and the Great Wall.  A woman fears a man who would force marriage on her, studies with the Shao Lin monks, creates Wing Chun, which is passed down for generations and then taught to Bruce Lee.  A man nails objections to a Church on a heavy wooden door, then a king lusts after a women he isn't married to, and today the beliefs of over a billion people are changed.  A country that once had a tradition of taking the elderly up mountains and throwing them off sheer cliffs now has the largest elderly population on the planet.  A man who once said he felt slavery was just ends up freeing the slaves.  A Jew sets out to abolish his corrupt church, but ends up creating a larger and more corrupt one in its place.

Sandpainting

A neuron fires the color of red, another fires the feeling of warmth, another the smell of lavender, another the tactile sensation of touch.  These convergences turn into a memory, and this memory becomes a part of a chain of memories that form a conscious being.  These memories are kept, and accessed, over a period of about a hundred years, until they stop being maintained.  After that, all that is left of the memories are the impact the body that formed them left on the universe.

Somewhere out in the universe, 14 billion years ago, something causes a field to break into a 12 dimensional universe.  Eight of these dimensions were folded in on themselves.  Three of them expand to become space dimensions.  One of them is being reconstructed in real time before our eyes.  The change in spacial position of the three dimension across a fourth gives us a perception that we call time.  This perception is what allows us to be.  This illusion is what makes everything we do seem significant.  All we are is sub-sub-atomic particles traveling one solution of an infinite number of paths from one point to another point in space.  We exist as an illusion, and then are no more.

There is no time left to start again.

Life We Create

Color

Dark ruby, rather opaque for a 2006.

Aroma

Tangy, acidy and raspberry-y...

Taste

I am coming to fall in love with Barbera more and more with every bottle I drink.  Its high acid tends to overwhelm, but when that subsides there are depths to it rivaled only by the best Cabs I've tasted.

The first: Underneath the initial blast of acid, pepper and raspberry lies a subtle tone of mushroom.  In the background raspberry, blackberry, bell-pepper and oak paint quite an interesting canvas.

Second: An interesting flavor of taco seasoning, cassias and black tea.

Finish

The wine has one of the best finishes I've had out of the region.  The tea flavors pop up, with a little hibiscus, and a spiciness that I have come to expect and love from Barberas.    The feeling of acid really stays with you, along with echos of cassias.  I really love this wine.

Pairings

Crisp fresh vegetables.  Whole peppers, jicama, pea pods and the like with a side of chunky guacamole and spicy hummus.  Mediterranean dishes would go well, particularly falafel with tzatziki or juicy gyros with a side of kalamata olives.

Song

Like a Prayer by Madonna

Movie

Spanglish

Persona

I like to remember wine by the people bottles remind me of. Every wine has a personality, and this wine is Lucy.  Lucy was one of those people that, though I met briefly, had a huge impact on my life.  She had long frizzy jet black hairy, freckle painted skin and a smile that could brighten a room.  She's the type of person that, if you loved music, would coax you into random song at any time of day.

Barbera My Love

I think that table wines get a bad rap, and aren't properly distinguished from cheap wine.  Table wine is usually well made, very clean and drinkable right out of the bottle.  You don't get the complexity of good wine, and you can almost always taste the booze, but it is still very drinkable.  Cheap wine, on the other hand, seems to me to be poorly made wine.  But what is cheap wine?  Well, I would say cheap wine is poorly made wine bottled, labeled and sold to look like real wine.  Your first thought might be the infamous Trade Joe's "Two Buck Chuck" //Charles Shaw//, but believe you me, there are much worse out there.  It is hard to say for sure, but I would say the Whole Food's Three Wishes wine series //2.50 is overpriced.  Please, please, PLEASE!  Before you buy Two Buck Chuck or Three Wishes, consider instead buying a commercial table wine like Carlo Rossi or Gallo.  It'll end up costing you the same amount of money, but be so much better.

Some very good wineries often have a 2nd or 3rd label which produces more affordable wines, and some even make table wines.  Sometimes these table wines are blends, and cover multiple vintages, which allows them to produce a very balanced wine for an affordable cost.  The wine I had last night is a good example:

 

 

Milliaire Winery Simply Red Table Wine

Tri-tip on the Barbie

 

So, Table Wine Good, Cheap Wine Bad... but what about young wine?  By young wine, I mean of course good red wine opened way too early.  We //the eight of us, not just my wife and I// had two other bottles of wine last night, one a little old, and one very young:

 

 

Rutherford Hill 2005 Merlot, The Kind of Old

2010 Casa de Fruta Pinot Noir, The Young

Now, the Merlot was amazing.  I'm sorry I didn't have my wine journal with me, I would have liked to have taken more detailed notes.  I'll have to revisit that bottle in a later post.  The Pinot, on the other hand, was a bit of a disappointment.  The funny thing was, it tasted a lot like Carlo Rossi's Burgandy.  Why?  Well, it just didn't have time to develop its flavor.  Usually when I drink young red wine, its the tannins that sort of ruin it for me.  With this Pinot the tannins weren't an issue, it was the lack of depth and complexity.  This bottle could have been amazing in 2014, or even 2013... but in early 2012 opening and drinking it was just in bad form.  Things got ugly.

So, Table Wine Good, Cheap Wine Bad, and Young Wine Ugly.

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